Here at Social Proof, since we rip on our tech boys so much, it’s time to level the playing field. So… Hello ladies! Instagram gave birth to a generation that we now call the “Gram-Whores.” These females are even worse than their predecessors the “Cam-Whores” because they come fully armed with light-enhancing filters like Kelvin and Lo-Fi. Their low self esteems and psychological incongruences bring us all sorts amusement. You know what they say… If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em!
Girls Seeking Validation
Sure, she’s smaller than a kilobyte, but that doesn’t mean you can’t throw her a bone.
The Hipster Girls
These are the girls who hold up traffic on Valencia sidewalks in order to score that money shot. They’re young, stylish, never without a cup of designer coffee in hand, and totally ripe for the photo-bombing.
The Boring Girls
This particular breed of girl feels a special kind of joy in making others feel inferior to her impeccable taste in wine and cats.
The Hopeless Romantics
Forget Path. This girl can turn any social network into her personal diary. Tweets are her inner monologues, pins are her hopes and dreams.
Girls That Are Too Cool to Smile
Let’s be real. Some people just look really awkward when they smile.
The Party Girls
Is this epilepsy? No, it’s just a party girl abusing the crap out of her iPhone’s flash because she forgot to use skinny-arm in those last five pics.
Social Proof travelled all the way to New York to add some exotic flavor to our next Hot Tech Boy of the week series. We first encountered this heartbreaker back in our college days at CMU through an HCI Methods project group. It had been a couple of years and you know what they say… absence most certainly makes the heart grow fonder.
He whisked us away to a clandestine garden in the East Village to conduct our interview. One thing was for certain, the hipsters of San Francisco could learn a thing or two from our homeboy. Glorious thick-rimmed glasses framed his cerulean eyes that twinkled with mischief. The delightful simplicity of a plain white tee and grey cardigan atop his tantalizingly skinny jeans took our breath away. And those kicks… We can say with full confidence that nobody knows how to rock a pair of bright, stylish Nikes better than this dreamboat. Yes, ladies. Feast your eyes on our Hot Tech Boy of the Week, Andrew Mercando. He is a super talented UX Designer at Skillshare with a killer sense of style. Can this beast from the east beat out the best of the west? Live from New York, this is Social Proof.
So Andrew, let’s get started. Tell us about yourself. How did you get to SkillShare?
So Hi, I’m Andrew Mercando. I’m a UX designer at Skillshare. I met you guys at CMU. I studied Communication Design and Human Computer Interaction about 3 years ago. I met the CEO of Skillshare through my sister, and we ended up chatting. Then I kinda met the whole team. The rest is history.
So you mentioned that you went to CMU. We recall that you switched Majors from Art to Design. What made you decide on the switch and how did that go?
It was a big switch! They made me start all over again, so I ended up on the 5 year plan. It had its plusses and its minuses. I guess when I went into school I didn’t know the difference between the fine arts and actual design. It was a little bit of an awakening. I sort of made the decision from dicking around in fine arts to getting a bit more serious and becoming a designer.
We also heard that you were the only straight boy in your design class. Did you learn any life lessons from this?
Is that true? Yeah I mean thinking back on it, there were a lot of girls, which was good. I don’t know if I learned any life lessons? …Maybe just how to deal with women better? I actually don’t even know if that’s true..
So switching gears. What are your hobbies? We’d like to get know you.
I’m an avid runner. As avid as I can be with my drinking habit. Nothing cures a hangover like a couple mile run! I’m also a big foodie. I don’t have some crazy diet like vegan or vegetarian or whatever. Also I really like pork.
Tell us more about your fitness routine. We’d love to hear more about your Nike Plus runs.
I was forced into doing that because I worked on NIke Plus for a while. I started running maybe 2 years ago, and I usually log some miles over the weekend. I try and get in the habit of waking up really early during the week, like 7 AM, to go for runs (Damn son, you’re better than us. Well OK, better than Amritha).
Tell us a little bit about your personal style.
I would say it’s pretty basic, but I like to mix and match stuff. Skinny jeans with some Nikes has treated me well for the past couple of years.
Come on… We want to hear more about your kicks!
There’s something about shoes that I really love. You can always mix and match them, and a lot of them are limited edition. There’s something about Nike that’s always got me.
Do you own a Nike Fuel Band? What do you think of them?
No I don’t own a Nike Fuel Band. I think they’re pretty cool though! It’s one of those nice all day tracking devices on the market as opposed to Fitbit and JawBone Up. Nike Plus has always been good at being a motivator to get you to the next step.
What are your favorite hot spots? Where can the ladies find you?
So I moved to East Village a while ago. And that’s where you can find me. I try not to go above 14th street ever. So let me run down my list. For cocktails, there’s a bar called Summit Bar. For late night, trashy scene guzzling, Hi Fi can’t be beat. Drop off service has 3 dollar beers until 8. And then for food? There’s a great mexican place called Zaragoza. Walking in there you think you’d get like Hepatitis, but it has really great burritos and tacos. Also I really love the people.
New York or San Francisco?
New York is definitely better. I’m gonna sound like a huge dick, but there’s just way more going on. I mean… New York is the center of the world! (Stop playing Andrew, we all know San Francisco is the center of the world)
New york ladies vs. San Francisco ladies?
You guys are very nice! And New York girls… they’re interesting. They’re my type. Busy, working ladies. People dress really well in New York in general too. For San Francisco, I don’t have anything to compare with really. To me maybe… San Francisco girls are like hippies?
Describe your ideal girl.
Girls who treat me like shit… Also, I like girls that are on the taller side. Probably brunette and/or asian. But not necessarily together. I like girls who are way smarter than me and girls that blow me away with their intelligence. You could be super smart about food or you could be the biggest computer nerd. Who wouldn’t be attracted to someone like that? So yes.. smart, tall, brunette, and attractive and maybe Asian. If that doesn’t describe half of New York, I don’t know what does.
We’d like to hear about Jake. Just like we’re a dynamic duo, we hear that he’s your other half at Skillshare.
I mean I met Jake when I started interviewing at Skillshare, he was the first designer there. We’re kind of like a “dynamic duo” as you guys said, and we just hit it off right away. One part of the interview process was coming in on a Wednesday night to a house party. I ended up staying at the office until 130 AM having drinks with everyone. So I guess that was the moment Jake and I fell in “work love.”
What is this app you designed… Player Status?
I entered this hackathon, and it was really fun. We basically used this app to scan all your Facebook photos. Based on the percentage of how many opposite sex people appear in your photos we’d give you a player rating. Funny story was that Jake was on the top of the leader board for a really long time. But we think because he has long hair that the app might have thought he was a girl…
One final question. So what’s your line?
Can I give the best line that I’ve ever heard? So I have this french friend in New York and he was like “yeah I left this bar with a girl.” And I asked him, “how do you move that on to bringing the girl back to your apartment? And he said, “no matter what, tell her that you live one block away. After 5 or 10 blocks there’s no turning back.” I haven’t used that one yet, but I might have to try it.
And then we were off to Brooklyn for some beer and dancing. Andrew, we will always that random community garden on Avenue B.
Product managers, designers, and developers are the bread and butter of any tech company big or small. These fascinating creatures add all kinds of spice and hilarity to the dating scene in San Francisco. Watch now as Social Proof re-enacts what to expect from each type of tech boy so you can accurately pick your own poison.
Hot Hipster Homeboy from Hayes- W4M- 23 (Hayes Valley)
It was a Wednesday morning like any other… or so I thought. I rolled out of bed on a sunny San Francisco morning and walked down to Hayes Valley. All I had on my mind on the way to Ritual Coffee Roasters was the long day of work I had ahead, and how much the MUNI sucks. Then my entire existence came to a S T O P . There you were standing in front of the coffee stand. You were standing perfectly straight. I could tell because your jeans were so unbelievably skinny that any slouch in posture could have been revealed instantly. God I couldn’t stop looking at your jeans. You could get any size 0 girl like myself to put down that Dynamo Donut. Your mustard beanie sat so gracefully on top of your intentionally messy do. Your gray American Apparel hoodie was unzipped just enough to reveal an American Apparel jersey V-neck. Both so tight. So tantalizingly tight. It was your mustache that ultimately completed your look. If sporting a furry mouse on your face floats your boat, call me a block of cheese. I tried to catch your glance, but you were too busy instagramming some latte art. I waited. It looked like you were finished, but no… You were checking in on foursquare. I thought to myself, “What a noob! Doesn’t he know that he can check into foursquare directly from instagram AND attach his magnum opus in the process?” But I couldn’t even think to correct you… You could write all the rules of social media for me and I’d follow, subscribe, view, like, love, gasp, comment, reblog, retweet, and favorite the crap out of all your content, baby. I tried to open my mouth to introduce myself, but your headphones were in, and I could see that you were listening to LCD Soundsystem on rdio. Such a rebel. Only conformists use Spotify. You sped off on your bike, but only after taking several artsy pictures of it. The California sunshine won’t hit anyone else’s bike quite the way it hit yours that morning. You had every right to capture it. I’ll never forget you my mystery man. I may not be great at the photography of everyday things, but I can promise you that I rock a plaid shirt better than any girl I know. I’m also in the process of buying a slouchy beanie and some Warby Parker glasses. I intend on making myself the woman of your dreams, if you’ll just give me a chance.
Beautiful Brogrammer Boy near Montgomery BART - W4M - 23 (SOMA)
You were exiting the 24 Hour Fitness on Sutter and I was on my 24th hackathon hour without sleep when we ran into each other. I mean, literally ran into each other, because I’m quite short and I don’t think you even noticed me as you swung your Adidas gym bag over your shoulder while cranking up the volume to LMFAO’s “Sexy and I Know It” on your iPhone. Normally I’m like, so beyond the Top 40 but I couldn’t deny the veracity behind their words. You were sexy, and you did know it, and now I did too.
In the kerfluffle I accidentally spilled some of my Philz mint tea on your freshly pressed striped button down shirt. I’m sure you could probably borrow a new one from one of your bros. You probably all dress the same, in which case, you might have been better off just not wearing a shirt at all— but I digress.
I apologized profusely and you uttered a string of incomprehensible one-syllable words. It was all good. Rad. Chill. Dope. Boss. It was like you were speaking a foreign language and let me tell you, this girl has a thing for men with accents.
A glance at the ID badge attached to your basketball shorts indicated that you were indeed one of those mysterious “brogrammers” I’d been reading about in the Chronicle. I never thought I would encounter one of your kind in the wild— out of the confines of your natural habitat (the marina). I quickly fought down the urge to debate the best CSS practices with you over brewskis and instead shyly made eye contact with your Birkenstock sandals. Your feet kind of resembled a hobbit’s, I would have pointed this out but I feared that any LOTR references may have been lost on you.
You adjusted your backwards baseball cap to just-the-right angle and excused yourself, making your way across the street and into the nearest Starbucks. I knew in that moment my friends would never approve.
Regardless… surely I could learn to love the taste of Miller Chill, or better acquaint myself with the geography of Cow Hollow. I may be tiny and nerdy but I rock heels better than the waitstaff at AsiaSF and I think I could get behind hiking. As long as I’m allowed to stop and take artsy Instagram pics along the way. So come at me, bro. Let’s make it happen.
Instead of providing you with an in-depth recap of this week in tech, we thought it would be more true to Social Proof’s style to skip the details and provide you with the appropriate reactions. Feel free to mimic these expressions when any of the following come up in conversation, but make it convincing. Then get the fuck out of there if anyone tries to probe for more deets (“Ugh, AT&T blows, I’m going to go outside, etc etc…”).
When we read rage about the new Pinterest profile redesign. Or Pinterest legal issues. Or really anything to do with Pinterest:
When Kevin Rose got bought by Google:
When my Klout score goes up:
When my Klout score goes down:
When I’m on the receiving end of a tech-scuse:
When Highlight tells me my BFF is nearby:
When I read that people woke up / went to sleep on Path:
Social Proof just came back from an EPIC trip to SXSW. It was our first time and let us tell you… Austin, TX sure knows how to party. But alas, all good times must come to an end, and there were definitely some lessons learned from this trip that no tech girl (and guy) should live without.
Get to where you’re going
DO take Pedicabs EVERYWHERE (look them up if you don’t know). Sure, they’re expensive, but whatever! All the drivers we met were really cool, one even knew what smangin’ was!
Trust us, riding a pedicab is better than getting lost and ending up at some random Aussie bar..
DON’T book the wrong freakin’ flight.
Look Good! Say Whatever to the Weather
DO look nice. Who cares about a little rain? Nothing is hotter than a damp girl in a sundress. Ponchos are a nifty accessory when it gets dark, but never compromise on style.
DON’T wear tights. It’s better to be wet and cold as opposed to DAMP.
Know Your Crew
DO hang out with your coworkers. They know you the best and are pretty awesome (especially when they get you into the turntable.fm party).
DON’T ever lose your crew for randos. Stick with your crew foreva. Ditch that weirdo trying to latch on!
Put Your Party Pants On
DO check out the cool bar scene that Austin has to offer because it’s not just about the SXSW parties. Our personal favorite: Barbarella’s
DON’T get bogged down by the VIP. We all have some sort of steady income and let’s face it, compared to SF, Austin drinks are cheap. It’s not worth it to spend so long in line. Also don’t stress about Google Village not letting you in… I might not have a conference badge bros, but you guys should make it easier to start a google hangout.
DON’T take shots. Pace yo self. You don’t want to look like this:
The Essentials of Networking
DO pitch our fake start ups. If it’s late at night and you really don’t feel like having a deep conversation with that schmoozer, tell them you work for ChickStrip… or even better… goBro.
DON’T take a video when you meant to take a picture (Amritha, you’re an idiot).
#Necessary
DO treat animals with respect. Refer to an owl as an owl when you speak with him. Direct quote from Amritha: “Excuse me, owl? Will you take a picture with us?”
DO Ask.com. Just do it.
DON’T have a wine & cheese plate with honey while sitting next to a garden. Bees galore!
Now that any Warby Parker-wearing hipster with a vision is founding a startup as often as someone tweets about eating a sandwich, it makes Social Proof wonder why certain apps just don’t exist. We went ahead and created them for you, thank us later.
Bases- Now you can cover ALL your bases, homeboy
Make that tech-scuse ROCK solid. You can link your Facebook, Foursquare, Twitter, and Path to discretely prevent incriminating check-ins. Have an overzealous friend who needs to check you in everywhere? Nullify that ish with Bases, they should know better! Hell, if you’re plastered, it won’t publish any of your check-ins. If you’re keeping it on the D-L to avoid one very special stalker, you can even get push notifications for when that crazy is in the vicinity. The cherry on the top: Automatically publish fake check-ins and tweets so it looks like you’re whining about staying in to do work when really you’re pounding back beers with your homeboys at Zeitgeist. You know… the ones you see at work all day anyway.
Val-U- I will pay you the value of that purposely left-behind item.
Awkward encounter? Think someone PURPOSELY left that t-shirt at your place and now keeps making an excuse to come by and “pick it up”? Put them in their place! With Val-U select from estimated values of generic apparel categories and then send over that money with a generic catchphrase (ex: “It’s not you, it’s me”). Advanced users can unlock our photo feature that allows you to photograph that orphan item to get an approximate value (and find out if that LV’s a fake). We also cover the inverse situation. Did that chick whine about being cold and “borrow” your jacket? With Val-U, pre-emptively send an invoice for the value of your jacket. Our operators are working around the clock to collect the money that you deserve.
Anthem- Feeling so fly like a G6
Have you ever wanted the chorus of your favorite song to play after you’ve said something BALLER? Or even after getting some? It’s simple with Anthem! All you’ve got to do is enter a situation, assign a clip to it, and then bow chicka wow wow, you’ve got yourself an anthem. Now you can blast Chris Brown’s “Look At Me Now” as soon as you get that raise! Is it your birthday? Make sure to jam to “In Da Club” for about 60 seconds after taking that 5th shot of tequila. It’s all about instant gratification, baby. The right timing has never been easier!
Rally- Because your friends are lazy as hell
We know how it is. You planned that big trip, and your annoying friends won’t wake up because 11:30 AM is “too early” and they got wasted last night. Don’t worry, we’ve got the full package to get them up and about in no time. As you’re on your way to a specified location, friends get push notifications every half mile that you get closer to your destination. Rest assured that messages become more and more passive aggressive as you near. We’ll even provide your friends with pit stops at coffee shops along the way to give them a kick after that hangover. Wake up alarms are also available and complete with guilt trips. Select one of our creative presets: “Remember how you promised me that we’d go like 5 times and then ditched me, bro?” or create your own! Flakes beware because this trip is ON like TRON!
Flaunt- You don’t get to a million subscribers by upgrading them all to friends.
Imagine walking into a bar and knowing exactly who’s there, how cool they are, and more importantly how douchey they are. Flaunt allows you to see everyone’s Klout score at a glance so you can talk to the “right” people. More importantly we use a complicated algorithm to evaluate one’s “douchebag” rating based on an analysis of the ratio of real tweets vs. troll tweets vs. humblebrags. Clicking into their name provides a suggestion of good conversation topics and more importantly suggestions of BAD conversation topics (“Yo Zuck, I heard Path is going to be the next Facebook killer”).
Krave- Your meal should be as delicious as your mancandy
It’s pretty simple, good food gets you in the mood. Bad food starts domestic altercations. Use Krave on that cozy night in to find something that will suit both partners. First you enter pre-selected restrictions (vegetarians, pescatarians, and ugh… vegans too). Second, enter specific aversions (“mushrooms are gross bro,” “garlic makes me wanna heave,” etc). Then… Voila! Krave has that meal delivered to you, and what happens next leaves you “kraving” for more.
ChickStrip- You looked better with the lights off.
This one’s pretty simple. Get that drunk girl to hold still for 2 seconds and take a picture of her face. Our special technology uses pixel color differentiation to remove make up and give you an accurate representation of what she’ll look like in the morning. Special filters like beer goggles, rebound, and birthday allow us to give you some reasonable leeway when making decisions because after all… we can’t catch all the grenades for you.
Cyrano- You don’t need to write your love letters yourself.
In this day and age, you can be whoever you want to be. That’s where Cyrano comes in. Meeting that hot tech girl for a drink? Prep yourself with tantalizing tidbits about their interests, favorite bands, and famous tweets. Our experts have hand curated this information just for you based on a thorough analysis of Twitter, Facebook, and Pinterest. Is it the big date and you’re crashing and burning? Use some lifelines. Phone a friend, ask the audience, take a 50/50 chance with one of our icebreakers. Just be anything but yourself.
G2G- My aunt just died.
Sometimes you’ve just gotta get out of there when that creep tries to close. Press a button and your phone will ring with one of our pre-recorded family emergency phone calls. Or you can create your own, just make sure to pause for your dialogue so it looks real! Hey, we’re not judging. If that freakshow tries to grab your number on the way out and insists on doing that annoying thing where he enters it into your phone and calls from your number, we have special technology that will make your phone number appear as a phony.
goBro- It’s like Uber for TaskRabbit.
Nowadays we need a lot more than just cabs. Sometimes you just need to lean on a bro. Just like an Uber, put in your request and enter your situation to see where the nearest bros are to bail you out. Need someone to start a fight to make you look tough? Looking for a pro wing-man? Or do you just need a friend? We can set you up with a bro in no time. Also, we’re hiring! Tweet us your application in 140 characters or less. @socialproofsf
There you have it! Please note that all of these ideas are the intellectual property of Social Proof. Any attempts to plagiarize will result in imprisonment and merciless trolling on twitter.
P.S. We really wanted to come up with something for “Insta-Slam” but that would be… APPALLING.
Social Proof created a Miso SideShow to show you our exclusive behind the scenes look at our “Ball So Hard” music video! We know you probably didn’t get all our bizarre inside joke references! In case you missed our video, watch it here, bro.
All you gotta do is:
1. Download the Miso iPhone App from the App Store
2. Open the app and search for Social Proof
3. Click into Social Proof and hit GO!
Here’s a little sneak peak of the juicy details you’ll see:
We’ve searched long and hard for our next hot tech boy because here at Social Proof, quality is our guiding principle. Amritha hit the jackpot when she creepily approached this stud muffin at a GitHub Drink Up event and asked him to be our hot tech boy of the week. Yes ladies, feast your eyes on Zach Holman. He’s an incredibly intelligent software engineer from GitHub with a fiery sense of humor and an undeniable charm. It was truly a treat interviewing this piece of man candy.
Zach welcomed us into GitHub Headquarters sporting a delightfully snug white tee, and let us tell you, it was as if we’d seen a man for the first time. So much swagger, so much edge… how does he do it? A man with a witty viewpoint AND a tantalizing smile? How irresistible! And yet, here he was standing in front of us, giving us the princess treatment complete with lollipops, beer, and Buxom Mascara. With every breath he took, our heartbeats raced. With every joke he made, the world just felt like a better place. Without further ado, we interview the legendary Zach Holman.
So Tell us a bit about yourself. How did you get to GitHub?
Hard hitting questions right away? I’m from Fargo, North Dakota which I think is hilarious. Then I went to Pittsburgh for Carnegie Mellon. After that I came out here and did developer stuff, and I joined GitHub a couple of years ago.
Ahhh Pittsburgh… you seem to love that place a lot. Pittsburgh or San Francisco?
San Francisco, I love this city!
Looks like we’re all CMU alum here. How do you feel about your education at CMU? Do you feel like it prepared you for the real world?
I think Carnegie Mellon is an excellent institution but it didn’t really prepare me for my job. I think for the stuff that I do, start up stuff, it’s a little bit… Let’s put it this way, most of the good people in the industry are self taught. I do wish I did more Computer Science while I was there. But yeah Carnegie Mellon… it’s an… excellent institution.
What do you like the most about working at GitHub?
God I don’t know, I can do whatever I want which is kind of rad. I walked into work at like 1:30 today which is good. Got drunk with a bunch of a coworkers last night, so it’s very lax. It’s how I like to work.
What about the work aspect?
I mean it’s pretty rad. We get to build products that people really love. For instance, there’s a lot of tweets saying “I would love to pay for your service! I know I don’t need to, but can I still pay anyway?” It’s nice to know that people actually care and you’ve impacted their lives.
Speaking of work… who would you say is your best wingman at work?
Jason Costello. He knows how to charm the ladies. He’s got a lady for himself, so he’s not competition. I bring him in with that attractive face, and when he says no, I swoop in.
What’s your take on girls in tech?
I think we need more of them! The industry is really lacking in women and it sucks. Look at San Francisco, every meet up you go to is all dudes. It’s such a great industry to get into and everyone should be open to it. There are so many studies in which diverse groups perform better than non-diverse groups because you get so many different view points. I think it’s just great to get as many opinions as possible in any given work situation.
Zach, that’s nice and all but… What’s your take on GIRLS in tech?
Slammin. Is that appropriate to say? Come on, a pony tail and sucker (pointing at Sabrina), what more could you want?
Well then… Describe to us your ideal girl.
Smart and independent, I would get bored by someone who is not independent. By that I mean they actually do shit in the industry. And then of course, I want someone funny.
But describe funny! We feel like every guy out there says they want a girl that’s smart, independent, and funny. Are there specific metrics for you?
My metric for humans in general is that they should have an edge of some variety. Because otherwise it’s like white bread! With these kinds of people I’m uninterested to the point where I get angry at them for being very bland. (Amritha agrees x 10000. Zach Holman <3 <3)
So you’ve described your ideal girl. Now describe to us your ideal first date with that girl.
Umm I dunno. I like drinks! I usually just drink gin and tonic… Let me point out that women who like gin are really awesome women.
Where can you get best gin and tonic in the city?
Oh I’d say Rickhouse (In case you’re wondering, Social Proof has been on dates there… with each other).
I don’t know if you’re familiar with our entry about Tech-scuses, but what’s the craziest tech-scuse you’ve ever given?
I’ve got to work or something…(Looks like our hot tech boys seem to have some common ground). Or I’m sitting on a grassy knoll and thinking for a few hours, I can’t hang out. That’s a good DESIGNER excuse.
What’s the most random app that’s gotten YOU booty?
I mean the phone app? Texts are nice, Twitter direct message sometimes… (Sabrina is a fan of the direct message…)
Alright, so you’re white. We’re clearly not. What’s your take on interracial mingling? Do you have a racial preference?
I love all women. I don’t prefer a certain race. I mean I hear ya, but I have no preference (Did you hear that? Ladies of all races come flocking).
So this is an interview. There’s no right or wrong answer, we just want to see how you think. Feel free to talk out loud and ask us any questions.
A train is going 120 mph. In the opposite direction another train with a VERY hot girl (trust us, she’s a 10) is going at 150 mph. The first train departs from San Francisco, and the second train departs from LA. They will cross paths at approximately 5 PM and that is the exact moment when you lock eyes. The person in front of you is wearing a red scarf. If you could project any snippet of code onto your window to get in her pants, what would it be. Assuming that when you cross paths, you fall in love and everything is slow motion and she will be able to read it.
Zach’s Answer:
Explain yourself.
For one it’s shell, cuz it’s amazing. And two, I’m just straight up asking to get into her pants.
Come on we’d like to see multiple solutions!
You do know I got famous off a tweet that said, mind problems like this, you should say f*** off and walk away!
I mean, I think this would work on a more outgoing personality type, but what if the hot girl in question is very shy?
Zach’s Answer:
I’m saying “I’m just kidding” to lower the barrier and the “maybe” to say actually… I wasn’t kidding. Now come jump on my train! (We’d say Zach just nailed the interview. He’s hired).
Alright let’s be real, the ladies really want to know. What’s your trademark move?
I haven’t used it in practice, but I’ve always wanted to use it. Now let’s say you’re at the movies… Did you know that the distance from here to here (points to Sabrina’s shoulder then points to her neck) is the same as the distance from here to here (points to Sabrina’s shoulder then smoothly puts his arm around her). It’s pretty rad right? I use that after I get to know someone and then I actually sink the deal.
So we hear you’re quite the casanova, tell us some stories. Shock us. Make our jaws drop.
What the f***? I have so many stories that are not appropriate for this interview. I was once in an orgy in Rickhouse… OK does the story have to be true?
ON THAT NOTE. WE WILL BE WRAPPING UP THE INTERVIEW.
If you like wearing sunglasses in hipster coffee shops and the sound of your own voice, this blog might just be for you. We're two tiny girls in San Francisco who have a lot to say about social media, flirtexting, and the startup world. We are the social media explosion known as Social Proof with your hosts, @sabrina and @amrithap.
Sure, she’s smaller than a kilobyte, but that doesn’t mean you can’t throw her a bone.
These are the girls who hold up traffic on Valencia sidewalks in order to score that money shot. They’re young, stylish, never without a cup of designer coffee in hand, and totally ripe for the photo-bombing.
This particular breed of girl feels a special kind of joy in making others feel inferior to her impeccable taste in wine and cats.
Forget Path. This girl can turn any social network into her personal diary. Tweets are her inner monologues, pins are her hopes and dreams.
Let’s be real. Some people just look really awkward when they smile.
